“Lawyer Will”

Me: Have you picked up the psychological report on Brother?

The Dad: Lawyer will

This text exchange was just one more step into the abyss of contentious parenting. Our ongoing litigation came to an end in the middle of July. It ended with an agreement to only return to court if there is a change in circumstances, or after a year of no visits. It hasn’t even been a month since we signed that agreement.

In order to obtain the report, a parent has to arrange to pick it up from the office, and show identification. It will only be released to a parent. The office is an hours drive away. With the agreement in place, both parents should be getting on with the business of parenting and healing.

At this point, I can’t tell if I’m parenting with the dad, or with his lawyer’s office. Either way, I am SUPER BUSY parenting two children who have significant needs. Neither the dad, nor his lawyer are helping to support the parenting ; financially, emotionally, or physically. They are just adding one more thing for me to juggle.

I have to stay focused on what is important. Right now, helping the AoA kids transition into a new school year is at the top of my list! Little AoA is transitioning well, and her biggest worry is how to make friends to play with at recess.

Brother is more challenging. This week, he only managed to go willingly through the front door of the school, 3 out of 5 days. The other two days, I had to take him to the back door, where me and a school employee have the option of physically removing him from my car without attracting attention. Those two mornings were filled with somatic complaints. I took him to the doctor one of the days, to rule out that he had any more than a simple cold. He was sure that he was going to die. His tolerance for any discomfort is incredibly low…more than I have seen in a very long time. I can only recall once in my 18 years of teaching, I had a student who insisted that she had a fever most every day. We started the days by taking her temperature to assure her that she was fever free.

Well, at least today is Saturday! Time to breathe and regroup…

~AoA