Life With the Elders – Part 1

Our AoA household is a multi-generational home, with my parents (77 year olds), my youngest kids (11 and 13), and now my adult son (30). We made the decision to enter into this lifestyle, in 2014. At the time, I was at the end of a divorce that lasted 18 months. The kids and I had moved in with my parents after escaping an abusive and unstable situation. We left everything behind. The ex-husband was and is, not supportive of the kids. He wanted (still wants) “ownership” of them. He use to say that he “owned” me because he had “papers” on me. Anyway, my parents were the ones to help me support the kids when we were left without a home or our belongings. I worked as a public school teacher, but it would take time and a final divorce decree to start me back on my feet. During that time, we lived with my parents, and in a 2 bedroom apartment. We all thought that we could save money, and give the kids a better life, if we combined households.

Once the divorce was final, I started looking for a home that would fit all of us. It didn’t take long to find one that I would qualify for on my own. We wanted to make sure that it was something I could manage, should my parents pass away. We also didn’t want to provide any ammunition to the ex-husband, by way of suggesting that I couldn’t raise the kids and provide for them. I might note here, that the ex-husband lives on a 70 acre farm that he inherited (after killing his father-he inherited his portion -another story). He sold off some of the land and was able to have a small house built. When I was married to him, I took over the household bills, and enabled him to pay off the house, and raise cattle. The farm is now worth near a million dollars. No matter, since it is not “earned income”, it does not factor into his support of the kids. That is based on his “disability” check that he gets from the government. It doesn’t make sense to me, but it is the way it is…..

All of this helped us weigh the pros and cons of living a multi-generational lifestyle. The adventure begins! We have had a few ups and downs along the way. There is much to share, as we navigate this journey……

Everyone has a role

Rehabilitation in the home

Driving

School

Outside Help

Trying to do too much

Clutter

Memory Loss

Depression

Traveling

My own grandparents passed away in their 60’s. Neither my parents nor I have had the experience of navigating the geriatric years.

Join me on this adventure!

~AoA

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